Yesterday morning was painful to say the least. The alarm on my phone went off too soon and it felt like I just laid my head down upon my pillow to fall asleep. I rolled myself out of bed, cursing work under my breath, and drug my sleepy self to the shower.
This is a very normal routine for me. Wake up, damn the work world, stumble towards the shower half blind and turn on the water. Little did I know my routine would be changed drastically and I would forever be scarred by the events of that morning.
I was performing the typical rinse, lather and repeat motions when something caught the corner of my eye. Through the pouring water from the shower head I looked to my right and saw what looked like the hand of Satan himself- or Freddy Krueger's fingers (To-MAE-to, To-MAH-to). There it was, between the shower curtain and the clear plastic curtain that helps block the water from pouring out into the bathroom, the biggest spider I have seen since living in Utah. Now to make matters worse, the thing was definitely alive and crawling down towards the bottom of the curtain...
*NOTE* it is a well known fact that I HATE things with more than four legs, or things with tales as long as their bodies (i.e. rats)... now I especially hate it when these alleged creatures start to move with all their legs- it makes me want to to throw up.
So what did I do? Scream? Damn right I did. Try to smack it? Seemed like the right thing to do- WRONG. The crazy demon ran down faster than a bat out of hell (with its eight... 8... ocho... legs) and started to attack! Quickly I moved out of the shower without the greatest of ease- okay I will admit, I practically fell out causing water to go everywhere. In a panic I ran into my room, soaking every place I stepped.
Since I feared for my life, I did not venture back to the area of the shower... but my roommate did. I heard her say "ohhhhh there is a huge spider right there!" I quickly threw my brown havianna flip flop at her (just one...) and ran for it! Now, what really happened during that time, I will never know because I was out in the living room having an asthma attack.
Do we know if The Dark Lord is dead? No. There has been no sign of He Who Shall Not Be Named, but that doesn't mean he isn't off gathering an army of eight legged demons to come and seek revenge for our attack....
I am currently processing my will because I know I will not survive this battle...
Peace be with you.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Ember: Noun, as in a dying fire...
In every one's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.- Albert Schweitzer
While surfing the net the other day I stumbled upon this quote and fell in love. I think everyone can relate to losing that inner fire at some point in their life- maybe more than once. These past few months I can for sure say mine has dwindled down to a lonely, weak ember. During this time period my faith in people has been lacking, my trust in others has been slim to none and I stopped believing that people would treat others how they wanted to be treated.
But also during these past few months there have been people who have reminded me that there are decent human beings out there. Although we are all selfish by nature, there are some that try their hardest to put others before themselves. Those are the people that strengthen my little inner ember and at the same time restore my hope and faith again. They are a blessing, an inspiration, a healthy reminder and leading example of what I should be like.
These people who have restored my faith have obviously come into my life for a reason, maybe a season or a lifetime. No matter how long they are around, I will always be thankful for them.
While surfing the net the other day I stumbled upon this quote and fell in love. I think everyone can relate to losing that inner fire at some point in their life- maybe more than once. These past few months I can for sure say mine has dwindled down to a lonely, weak ember. During this time period my faith in people has been lacking, my trust in others has been slim to none and I stopped believing that people would treat others how they wanted to be treated.
But also during these past few months there have been people who have reminded me that there are decent human beings out there. Although we are all selfish by nature, there are some that try their hardest to put others before themselves. Those are the people that strengthen my little inner ember and at the same time restore my hope and faith again. They are a blessing, an inspiration, a healthy reminder and leading example of what I should be like.
These people who have restored my faith have obviously come into my life for a reason, maybe a season or a lifetime. No matter how long they are around, I will always be thankful for them.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Hop- A- Long
Well I have officially hurt myself worse than ever. For the record, I would like to tell everyone who goes out boating this summer to make sure all the left over rope is off the boat before the boat takes off. I did not do this and got into a tangled mess with the rope, and lost. Thank God I didn't lose any limbs, just my dignity and some feeling in my leg- no big deal though.
So what does that mean for me? Well a nasty bruise that looks like I was beaten on my shin (this happened Saturday and you can still see the indent from the rope) and a big ol' bruise on my upper inner thigh that looks like I had to fight off a sexual predator. I am so thankful that it is just those- yes I may have to hop-a-long on a cane or crutches (whichever I prefer, I have both... cane has been the majority vote... bitches.) BUT it could have been way worse- i.e. missing a limb, breaking an ankle or having the inner thigh bruise actually be on my lady parts which would have probably required reconstructive surgery of said lady parts. So does it hurt? Yup. Does it suck? Kinda. Is it ugly? ohhhh yes. Could it have been worse? Way worse. So am I thankful its not? You betcha.
However, with this experience I have, as previously mentioned, acquired a cane. This is not only a fashion statement, but it is also a visual reminder that I can and will beat your ass with the cane if need be. I fully support Glee's nationally ranked cheer leading coach, Sue Sylvester, and her theory, "Caning works! And I think its about time we did a little more of it right here... Yes We Cane!" So just be aware people that I may be injured and I may not be able to run after you but I have no problem caning your ass if need be ;) <3 I would like to take a second to make a few shout outs to people who have been nothing but helpful!
*Mindy best roomie ever- she has been amazing since I have recently become handicapped. She has helped drive me places, gotten me ice when I need it and has put up with me watching Gossip Girl season 1 when she has already seen it.
*Megan! She not only came over to my house yesterday to keep me company for my day off/day of rest BUT she also helped me do laundry since I can't lift anything- Megan you are a rockstar!
* Tasha gets a the laugh award! Thank you for calling me a "hobbit" in your drunken state of mind on Sunday. I know you meant for it to come out as "hobbles" but it was so much better when you yelled "hobbit coming through" as you were trying to get people to stop for me. Thank you for that you lush :)
*Robbie (who knows if you actually read this) also gets a shout out for being helpful! It was nice to be picked up and taken to Tasha's on Saturday night after all the crud that happened with the boat! I didn't want to be left alone and it was very kind of you to come and get me. Also, thanks for the beer the other night- another great gift... would have been better if you had one instead of your stupid sugar free redbull... there is a reason why "bull" is involved in the title of that energy drink- as in its "BULL" that you had one and not a beer. But you make me smile so thank you!
*Alexa! Holla to my amazing coworker for bringing me crutches which saved my life Monday at work! With out them I would have been in way more pain than I am- also the girl loaded me up with fun gossip magazines which will be nothing but pure entertainment. I may be slightly disabled, but at least I am not as tragic as Lindsey Lohan! Thank you Alexa for giving me those magazines and reminding me that its not so bad- I could be married to Spencer Pratt praying for my life.
*And of course shout out to everyone who has inquired about how I am doing and all the "get wells" It means a lot to me to have such amazing people in my life locally, nationally and internationally :) Love you all!
Moving on- first Pride festival of my so called life was a success! I had a cane the whole time which kinda blew, but so many people were there to help me hop all over the place- lots of nice lesbians offered to help me get from point A to point B, got a great tan and saw so many wonderful people! Can't wait till next year- its gonna be amazing!
I wish there was more going on- but I think this is enough for now. What could be cooler than a cane? It brings so much laughter to the room, so many smiles to peoples faces and it helps me walk! Hooray for canes! Boo for ugly bruises! Hooray for friends that help me out! Boo to people who don't give two craps less how things are going when they should be the one person who does care *cough*! Hooray for summer and crisp tan lines! Hooray for AC working! Hooray for life and all of its joys!
Live healthy people :)
So what does that mean for me? Well a nasty bruise that looks like I was beaten on my shin (this happened Saturday and you can still see the indent from the rope) and a big ol' bruise on my upper inner thigh that looks like I had to fight off a sexual predator. I am so thankful that it is just those- yes I may have to hop-a-long on a cane or crutches (whichever I prefer, I have both... cane has been the majority vote... bitches.) BUT it could have been way worse- i.e. missing a limb, breaking an ankle or having the inner thigh bruise actually be on my lady parts which would have probably required reconstructive surgery of said lady parts. So does it hurt? Yup. Does it suck? Kinda. Is it ugly? ohhhh yes. Could it have been worse? Way worse. So am I thankful its not? You betcha.
However, with this experience I have, as previously mentioned, acquired a cane. This is not only a fashion statement, but it is also a visual reminder that I can and will beat your ass with the cane if need be. I fully support Glee's nationally ranked cheer leading coach, Sue Sylvester, and her theory, "Caning works! And I think its about time we did a little more of it right here... Yes We Cane!" So just be aware people that I may be injured and I may not be able to run after you but I have no problem caning your ass if need be ;) <3 I would like to take a second to make a few shout outs to people who have been nothing but helpful!
*Mindy best roomie ever- she has been amazing since I have recently become handicapped. She has helped drive me places, gotten me ice when I need it and has put up with me watching Gossip Girl season 1 when she has already seen it.
*Megan! She not only came over to my house yesterday to keep me company for my day off/day of rest BUT she also helped me do laundry since I can't lift anything- Megan you are a rockstar!
* Tasha gets a the laugh award! Thank you for calling me a "hobbit" in your drunken state of mind on Sunday. I know you meant for it to come out as "hobbles" but it was so much better when you yelled "hobbit coming through" as you were trying to get people to stop for me. Thank you for that you lush :)
*Robbie (who knows if you actually read this) also gets a shout out for being helpful! It was nice to be picked up and taken to Tasha's on Saturday night after all the crud that happened with the boat! I didn't want to be left alone and it was very kind of you to come and get me. Also, thanks for the beer the other night- another great gift... would have been better if you had one instead of your stupid sugar free redbull... there is a reason why "bull" is involved in the title of that energy drink- as in its "BULL" that you had one and not a beer. But you make me smile so thank you!
*Alexa! Holla to my amazing coworker for bringing me crutches which saved my life Monday at work! With out them I would have been in way more pain than I am- also the girl loaded me up with fun gossip magazines which will be nothing but pure entertainment. I may be slightly disabled, but at least I am not as tragic as Lindsey Lohan! Thank you Alexa for giving me those magazines and reminding me that its not so bad- I could be married to Spencer Pratt praying for my life.
*And of course shout out to everyone who has inquired about how I am doing and all the "get wells" It means a lot to me to have such amazing people in my life locally, nationally and internationally :) Love you all!
Moving on- first Pride festival of my so called life was a success! I had a cane the whole time which kinda blew, but so many people were there to help me hop all over the place- lots of nice lesbians offered to help me get from point A to point B, got a great tan and saw so many wonderful people! Can't wait till next year- its gonna be amazing!
I wish there was more going on- but I think this is enough for now. What could be cooler than a cane? It brings so much laughter to the room, so many smiles to peoples faces and it helps me walk! Hooray for canes! Boo for ugly bruises! Hooray for friends that help me out! Boo to people who don't give two craps less how things are going when they should be the one person who does care *cough*! Hooray for summer and crisp tan lines! Hooray for AC working! Hooray for life and all of its joys!
Live healthy people :)
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